You may have people in your life who you would immediately describe as happy. They smile and laugh a lot. They’re usually in a good mood, have a positive outlook, and seem to enjoy themselves in just about any situation.
Maybe you’d describe yourself that way, too. If not, or if you wish you could be even a little bit happier, how do you get there? Can you learn how to be happy, or is happiness something that’s beyond your control?
According to Christopher Celano, MD, a psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital, you can do much to boost your happiness. “One of the very cool things about happiness is that a lot of happiness—up to 50% of happiness, according to one study—is under our own control,” he says.
And that’s important, because happiness and emotional well-being are key pillars of physical health and how to live a fulfilling life.
What Does It Mean to Be Happy?
If your goal is to find more ways to be happy, it might first help to understand what happiness is, psychologically speaking.
“When people talk about being happy, I think they often are referring to a sense of well-being,” Dr. Celano says. “From a psychological standpoint, emotional well-being is a broad term that includes several positive thoughts and emotions. Some of these are more focused on pleasure and contentment, while others are more focused on meaning, purpose, and satisfaction with life. If someone considers themself to be happy in life, I would usually think that they are engaging in activities that bring them joy and meaning, have fruitful relationships with others, and feel that they have a strong purpose in their life.”
It’s worth noting that happiness is not the absence of sadness, fear, or other negative emotions. Denying such feelings and pretending to be joyful all the time aren’t among the good habits for happiness. Indeed, emotional well-being is acknowledging and expressing all of your feelings healthily.
One way to think of happiness is that it’s the ability to cope with the stressful or challenging times, while also being able to fully enjoy and make the most of the best of times.
Why Happiness Matters
Being happy does much more than put a smile on your face. Research shows that happiness can bolster your health, relationships, productivity, and much more. “Happiness—and psychological well-being in general—has several important implications for health,” Dr. Celano says. “People who have higher levels of well-being tend to live longer and are less likely to have chronic health problems, like heart disease. Well-being also is associated with stronger and more positive relationships with others and a lower likelihood of experiencing negative emotions, such as depression.”
Not surprisingly, happiness tends to lower stress. Feeling joy and optimism can reduce levels of the stress hormone cortisol, helping to protect blood vessels and organs. Happiness is also associated with lower blood pressure, a stronger immune system, and even greater pain tolerance.
Happy people also tend to enjoy their work more and are often more efficient on the job. A 2022 British study of workplace productivity, for example, found that happiness made employees about 12% more productive.
Actionable Steps to Boost Happiness
If you’re looking for tips for happiness or just some simple advice on how to be happy, Dr. Celano says there are many steps you can take in all areas of your life. Even in challenging circumstances, you can develop some lasting habits for happiness. “While happiness certainly can be affected by the things going on in our lives, happiness frequently depends on the things that we choose to focus on and activities that we choose to perform,” he says.
Build Positive Daily Habits
A healthy lifestyle doesn’t guarantee happiness, but certain behaviors definitely support your physical and emotional well-being. Consider these tips for happiness:
- Studies have shown that even a single exercise session can improve your mood. And a 2018 study of more than 1 million adults, published in The Lancet Psychiatry, found that exercising for at least 45 minutes, three or more times a week, was associated with a brighter mood and a lower risk for depression and anxiety. Exercise can contribute to happiness in several ways. Physical activity improves mood by releasing “feel-good” brain chemicals, such as endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine. And activities that involve other people, such as an exercise class, pickleball, dance, and just walking with a friend or two, increase your socialization, which is another important ingredient for happiness.
- The relationship between sleep and happiness is an interesting one. Research shows that happier people tend to have greater sleep quality, while getting sufficient sleep (around seven hours for most adults) contributes to better health and better mood.
- A balanced diet that provides essential nutrients and supports weight management can also bolster your physical and mental health.
- Gratitude practices. And don’t dismiss the benefits of gratitude. Taking time to acknowledge the positive things in your life—family, friends, good health, a nice home, etc.—supports happiness and can help steer thoughts away from problems, complaints, and things beyond your control. “Another way to cultivate happiness would be to create a daily gratitude practice, like sharing a positive event for which you are grateful with a family member or friend,” Dr. Celano recommends. Keeping a simple gratitude journal, with simple messages or words of thanks, is another way to focus your thoughts on the positive people and circumstances in your life.
Strengthen Relationships
Investing in your relationships can pay dividends for your happiness. Many studies through the years have found that having positive relationships is one of the most consistent predictors of a happy life. Satisfying relationships make people happy and may improve the odds of long-term health.
People are social creatures, which means family, friends, neighbors, work colleagues, and strangers with whom you have positive encounters can also contribute to your happiness. Social interaction helps ease feelings of loneliness and isolation, while stimulating your brain in ways that support healthy cognition, too.
But you don’t have to be a social butterfly and have dozens of friends around you all the time. While researchers debate the exact number of friends people need to have what experts consider the optimal social circle, it’s generally accepted that having three or four friends is enough to increase happiness and lower stress, anxiety, and loneliness.
Manage Stress and Emotions
Too much stress and too many negative emotions can obviously make it harder to be happy. When you’re feeling stressed, the body produces more of the stress hormone cortisol, which diminishes the feel-good chemicals in the brain. Stress also drains your mental energy, making it harder to enjoy even simple activities. And stress can lead to unhealthy habits that diminish the capacity for happiness, like withdrawing from others, substance use, and poor eating and sleeping habits.
And when your mind goes to a negative place, such as ruminating about things you can’t control, mistakes you’ve made, or grudges you can’t let go of, happiness can be much harder to find.
Knowing how to reduce stress can be a powerful skill. To overcome stressors in your life, try to develop happiness-supporting habits such as meditation and relaxation exercises. Turn negative self-talk and self-criticism around. Think about your successes and the things you do well. Consider reaching out to a mental health professional if you feel stress and negative emotions are interfering with your everyday life and keeping you from a better quality of life.
Find Purpose and Meaning
Many mental health experts point to “a sense of purpose” as a key pillar of happiness and how to live a fulfilling life. The things that make up your sense of purpose and meaning can include the big stuff, like family and work, as well as hobbies and being a good neighbor.
Writing poetry or playing in a community band can give meaning and purpose to your everyday life. Tending to your garden or playing catch with a neighbor’s child can do the same. Think about the activities you enjoy that go beyond just a way to pass the time, and devote more time to them.
“During a busy work week, it can be helpful to schedule time into our schedules to perform activities that are enjoyable or meaningful, like reading a good book, talking with a friend on the phone, or praying,” Dr. Celano says. “This can help to break up any stress you may be experiencing and to focus on some of the things that you might find to be particularly meaningful.”
Embrace Resilience
Remember that happiness can coexist with struggle and sadness. And if you feel the challenges in your life are becoming overwhelming, take time to recall ways in which you overcame challenges and got through the hard times.
You’ve spent your whole life building resilience to help you through whatever you are facing now. Certainly, a chronic illness, the loss of a loved one, or other life-changing experience can make the pursuit of happiness more difficult. But if other manageable factors interfere with your happiness, come up with ways to avoid them or diminish their influence in your everyday life.
“If you really are struggling to find happiness, it can be helpful to think through some of the things in your life that might make it harder to be happy,” Dr. Celano says. “For example, if you find that going on social media just makes you irritated, see if you can take a break from it.”
Common Myths About Happiness
While there may be plenty of ways to be happy or at least support a journey toward happiness, there are also a lot of misconceptions about what it takes to live a fulfilling life filled with happiness and joy.
For example, even though the phrase “money can’t buy happiness” is widely accepted as a truism, plenty of people insist that you can’t be truly happy without a lot of money. Several studies have produced conflicting findings, with some research suggesting that happiness tends to plateau at a certain point after your income covers your basic needs, while other studies found that there is no plateau. A 2023 study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences appears to have put the debate to rest. Yes, your happiness may increase as your income also increases, but only if you were already a happy person. Making more and more money is unlikely to turn an unhappy person into a happy one.
Other misconceptions include the idea that happiness is all genetic. While it’s true that genetics plays a role in a person’s happiness propensity, your genes don’t mean you’re fated to a certain level of happiness or unhappiness. As Dr. Celano notes, your environment, behavior, and choices go a long way in determining just how happy you can be.
Another common misconception is that losing weight will make you happy. People who seem happier after weight loss are more likely buoyed by having more energy, sleeping better, and doing more things they enjoy rather than having simply dropped some pounds.
And as people get older, there can be a tendency to assume that their happiest years are behind them. But research has shown that happiness often increases later in life, as the pressures of a job and raising a family subside. Age can often bring on greater emotional stability and a simpler set of priorities, both of which can contribute to happiness.
When to Seek Help
If any of these tips for happiness aren’t providing the results you want, or if you find yourself unable to make changes on your own, you may want to consider reaching out for help.
“If someone is experiencing frequent or persistent sadness, particularly if it is interfering with their ability to function, then I would recommend speaking with a medical provider,” Dr. Celano says. “Some mental illnesses, such as depression, can involve persistent or frequent bouts of sadness, sometimes accompanied by low interest and changes in energy level, sleep, appetite, and the ability to concentrate. It is very important to identify these illnesses, because they can significantly impact our ability to function. Fortunately, there are many safe and effective treatments for mental illnesses, like depression.”
Everyone is entitled to happiness and emotional well-being. But those things aren’t always easy to attain without some help along the way. If you want to know how to improve your mood and level of happiness, you should also feel free to share your concerns with supportive friends and relatives you trust. Medical professionals and your social circle may be the community that helps you find the happiness that is eluding you.
